The last few weeks have been like no other in my life. I'm a 37 year old woman and have experienced a great deal of loss in those years. Yet, none had prepared me for the passing of my best friend, John Henry Rew.Simply put:
Our red-headed hottie with a personality to match, was the king of fabulosity and fun. He enjoyed life, and his enthusiasm and passion were contagious. It was hard to spend time with him and not feel good about yourself. His love of all things Orange was just an extension of his fiery wit, mischievous personality, and fantastic style. John Henry made everyday a party.
His friend Annie Lawrence recently described him as "...the soul of generosity." Always willing to listen and advise, open his home to friends and strangers alike, and go the extra mile to show you the more optimistic side of life, John Henry made deep, lasting impressions on all who knew him.
During the gathering after his funeral service, I had the unexpected honor of toasting our boy. Not having much notice, I really didn't know what I would say. And although I gave my best heartfelt toast, raising our glasses "to the orange", there is something deeper that has stayed with me.
I looked out on a large group of people; Family, childhood friends, college classmates, colleagues, teamates, and his beloved partner, Colin - A wide cross-section of people as diverse as the colors of the rainbow flag he loved to adorn himself with. And I was and am moved to have seen all his community in one place, connected to eachother by his beautiful orange aura. A true gift to us all in a time of great sadness and confusion.
I hope that this blog will be an instrument to keep our connection alive in his honor. A place to Share our stories, pictures, videos, thoughts, and lessons. A place to continue to be his community together.
"...Someday we'll find it, the Rainbow Connection. The lovers, the dreamers, and me."
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3 comments:
Hello! I am in LA and I am thinking about John Henry. I was in Seattle, Monterey and Edinburgh thinking about John Henry. The world feels lopsided without him. I have to just blurt to people around me that I lost my cousin and I feel weird. There's just no getting around it. But I'm also buying those people copius amounts of alcohol in honor of him. He was always buying me drinks. I can't believe how lucky I was to have known him. And I regret that I didn't see him more this last year. I just thought he'd always be there. And he would have been. Because he's the greatest. And I can only hope to aspire to be as generous as him. He has given me so much.
Wonderful job Erin!
I want to share with you all JH's last game...last at bat with the Mavericks. We were losing that game against the Warriors 3-0 and JH was the first to bat in the final inning. We needed a spark and JH knew it.
He stepped into the batters box and looked at the first pitch...ball 1...he patiently waited for the next pitch...ball 2. Knowing that we needed a runner on base he was willing to take a free pass to first. He stepped out of the batters box and stretched his body out before stepping back in. He looked at strike 1... then he looked at ball 3 . With the count at 3-1 he then stepped out of the batters box again and took a couple of practice swings. The umpire told him to stop delaying the game and get back in the box. John Henry looked perplexed as he explained to the umpire..."I'm very nervous". On the next pitch he clobbered the ball 20 feet over the outfielders head and ended up on third base. We rallied behind that leadoff triple to come from behind and win the game 4-3.
John Henry was the heart and soul of the Mavericks. He always had a team first attitude on and off the field. He was the definition of an ideal teammate. This year alone John Henrys magical touch added one of the Mavericks top players Ross Zakeer, Adrian's roommate. Also, at the Big Apple Softball Leagues draft this year JH recommended that we draft Rich Gilfert who turned out to be a great addition because of his unselfish attitude and solid play.
Last night the Mavs held a fundraiser at GYM bar for our trip to Phoenix to attend the Gay World Series. Before going into the bar I took a moment to stand in front of JH's apartment door (we would have been up there for a pre-party), while looking at the door and his buzzer with-the initials JH I realized that I was hoping for Ashton Kutcher to open the door and yell "You've been PUNKED"
No such luck. 22 days have passed.....my tears are drying....I am now realizing that this world will never again be the same place to me that it was before August 23rd.
I was one of John Henry’s childhood friends. We lived a block away from each other near Greenwood Lake where we spent much time swimming in the summers, building the best decorated tree forts in the woods, planning and plotting out our great escape to live a life in Hollywood, California (where John Henry would be a famous actor – I still don’t know what the plans were for me in California..…we were pretty young and JH had a wonderful imagination) and living each day as a new adventure.
People have asked me what JH was like as a child. As was in his adulthood, life with John Henry was anything but dull. He brought color and vibrancy into my life. I had the best childhood with him!! I have to be one of the luckiest people in this world to have experienced having this little red-haired boy around the block become my friend when I was five years old. I can’t imagine my life without him. Since childhood we’ve always kept in touch, text messages, emails, phone calls and holiday chats. But, visits were few and far between. I wish I had another fresh memory of us to hold onto. I miss him but I do see him in my dreams every night.
He seemed to have touched people – even people that didn’t really know him, loved him. It spilled over into his adult hood where he was free to express himself so much more than in our “small town”. And what a wonderful large family of friends he has.
I will always remember how his hugs felt, his laugh, and his love. I have a lifetime of memories. I am so grateful that I was blessed to have had John Henry in my life.
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